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2013-08-06 02:30 8104474 Anonymous (beautiful.jpg 500x750 47kB)
Hey female creature here.
I'd like to start a okaycupid thread where the females give the males advice about their okaycupids.
I'm not trying to brag or throw privilege around but when I had a okaycupid I had about 80-100 messages every time I logged on. Which was about once every two weeks. If it was a Fri or Sat night I'd get that amount of messages and triple the views or more. Which makes it fairly obvious that on that site females are far more sought out than males, especially with what I've read here.
With at least two thirds of the messages I'd delete them without opening them. I'll attempt to explain why and what makes a eye catching message/profile in a min. In the mean time ask specific questions if you'd like, or post your profile. Ladies reply with what you like/dislike about them or what you think or what makes a good profile to you.
I think there is a science behind it.
2 min later 8104505 Anonymous
OP, I believe that you are who you say you are and that you have the best of intentions. But this thread is going to be filled with angry misogynists in approximately no time flat.
3 min later 8104524 Anonymous
I don't have an okcupid but I'm thinking of making one soon
What are my chances as a 19 year old unemployed tech school student who still lives with mom?
4 min later 8104546 Anonymous
>>8104505
I think OP's intention is trolling because I'm not a tard.
4 min later 8104555 Anonymous
I quickly became real tired of talking to girls on there.
>have handsome, mysteriously playful profile picture
>make aloof, intimidating and intriguing profile
>show humour where applicable
>list literature, music and movie preferences
>be a little a seductive
>shoot unconventional messages or visit a profile and wait for them to contact me
I was also so bored that I answered something like 600 questions. Made sure to do it during the day, so that I showed up on the social stream of whoever OKC thinks I matched with, or something.
5 min later 8104565 Anonymous
>>8104474
or how about not even try online dating?
take average joe and ripped joe for example
say that average joe has a great personality, but is meh in the looks/fitness department. on okcupid, as per the enormous competition for females based on info from a virtual account, he has a low chance of success unless he transmits his charisma/hilarity/etc. through msging.
now the ripped guy will have more luck based on first impressions and an overall opinion of him - he's hot. the personality aspect may not be conveyed accurately through messages (hell not even i can do it with my best friends on facebook) and thus only a date could culminate.
tl;dr finding potential mates in real life has a higher success rate than online dating so to all of you faggots with okcupid profiles delete them and go look elsewhere otherwise you'll get rejected instantly (aka. OP)
6 min later 8104579 Anonymous
>>8104505
You must be the same person who called us misogynist for claiming that maybe there is such a thing as female privilege.
7 min later 8104596 Anonymous
>>8104505
Thank you for believing me and giving me that warning. I'm not new here though and the misogynists don't phase me. The who are interested want help and will contribute productively the others I'll ignore. It hurts no one but themselves if they choose to get angry at nothing. I expect that reaction always on 4chan though coupled with morbid curiosity to have insight into my personal life or see my female reproductive organs.
Inb4: 'Attention whore, show your tits attention whore! Pls reply.'
7 min later 8104614 Anonymous
There is no advice. I don;t understand it.
>make profile a year ago
>no luck at all
>remove it
>make it again recently
>upload a decent picture of myself this time and make my profile really, really fleshed out
>two hotties message me with "hey :) x"
>I respond
>only one of them responds
>the one then starts ignoring me
Oh I guess they found some other guy that was hotter.
So bullshit. Just avoid it.
8 min later 8104629 Anonymous
>>8104555
>>have handsome, mysteriously playful profile picture
>>make aloof, intimidating and intriguing profile
>>show humour where applicable
>>list literature, music and movie preferences
>>be a little a seductive
>>shoot unconventional messages or visit a profile and wait for them to contact me
You sound pretentious as fuck, and I guarantee no one else interpreted your profile, pictures and messages as you meant them to.
9 min later 8104646 Anonymous
>>8104629
ugly fag detected.
9 min later 8104647 mysterys biggest fan (itsnothing.jpg 248x252 71kB)
>females give the males advice
>mfw
9 min later 8104657 Anonymous
>>8104565
>now the ripped guy will have more luck based on first impressions and an overall opinion of him - he's hot. the personality aspect may not be conveyed accurately through messages (hell not even i can do it with my best friends on facebook) and thus only a date could culminate.
Though the picture is what first catches my interest it isn't all about looks. And you are right about the personality not being able to be conveyed through messages, but this can work for you if you are a cripplingly shy person.
10 min later 8104662 Anonymous
>>8104647
You didn't know about /adv/? It's all women answering the questions on that board. Don't go there.
10 min later 8104668 Anonymous
I'm thinking of making one and calling myself chad thundercock
12 min later 8104704 Anonymous
kansaswright... be gentle my friends
13 min later 8104721 Anonymous (bluh.png 768x487 58kB)
>>8104629
>You sound pretentious as fuck
I'm certainly not a plebeian.
>and I guarantee no one else interpreted your profile, pictures and messages as you meant them to.
Picture related.
15 min later 8104759 Anonymous
>>8104629
Yea I agree, he seems to think a little too highly of himself. You have to have a couple of flaws too. You should point out a few short comings to avoid looking too pretentious. Like 'I suck at spelling lol'. It can be something small like that to something big like admitting you have social anxiety and depression. You never want to pretend to be something you are not. Guys on /r9k/ don't realize you can use flaws to your advantage too. Certain personality flaws can be alluring and mysterious or induce sympathy/the nurturing instinct.
You aren't looking for your ideal girl either, but a human just like you. The biggest mistake guys on r9k seem to make is seeing the other gender as untouchable and unhuman. You'd be surprised how fulfilling a simple friendship with a girl can be if you allow yourself view them as having worth other than romantic or sexual.
16 min later 8104769 Anonymous
>>8104596
well, fair enough.
What kinds of hobbies and interests do I need to take up before I make a profile? Because at the moment I know I'm not going to get anywhere. Aside from computers and video games, which I already know don't count, I enjoy playing golf and watching baseball, two things I know women aren't likely to want much of, and I don't really watch any TV or movies, which seems to be a big chunk of most people's interests.
17 min later 8104792 Anonymous
>>8104721
You are a bit pretentious but many robots could take a page from that book and do with more confidence.
19 min later 8104837 Anonymous (lol.png 755x462 49kB)
>>8104721
And although I'm not a pleb, it's a good idea to indulge them in their plebby interests.
>>8104759
>>8104792
Honestly, I just did this to win - like I would a game. That's the kind of mindset you can't fail with.
20 min later 8104853 Anonymous
>>8104662
I'm a man and I was born there. What does that mean?
23 min later 8104885 Anonymous
>>8104837
this dude sounds like a major turd. more proof that women go for the shitty guys?
23 min later 8104897 Anonymous
>>8104474
>tfw you will never have that nose
24 min later 8104901 Anonymous
>>8104885
>shitty guys
What are shitty guys? Men do all the work and are expected to be these white knights in shining armor. Men are never as shitty as the women they are with.
24 min later 8104910 Anonymous (tfw.jpg 841x770 79kB)
>get cute looking chicks visiting my profile, but no messages...feels bad man
25 min later 8104918 Anonymous
>>8104901
to say this kid in the thread isnt shitty is just stupid of you, son.
25 min later 8104926 Anonymous
>>8104885
>>8104918
If it makes you feel any better, I felt pretty shitty after doing this. I deleted my account after taking some screenshots.
25 min later 8104929 Anonymous
>>8104885
>all this jellymad
Looks to me like this guy is a champion at okcupid, he's either really damn good looking or has a great profile (from a girl's perspective) or both. OKC is all about marketing yourself. You put yourself on a webpage, it's all materialistic. You're the one that sounds pretentious as fuck.
27 min later 8104946 Anonymous
>>8104792
did you just see his results and then change your opinion of "pretentious" to "confident"?
27 min later 8104958 Anonymous
>>8104769
List your own hobbies and interests but only if you have confidence in them. For example if you think the fact that you talk to yourself is creepy don't list it. But if you play games and our proud - list it. Don't worry about what you conventionally see as being worthwhile. It's the same constructs and ideas you have about what is 'worthwhile' that makes normal socialization seem so foreign. (Not saying you talk to yourself just an example).
28 min later 8104972 Anonymous
>>8104837
>And although I'm not a pleb, it's a good idea to indulge them in their plebby interests.
No, it's not. You should always be honest.
>>8104958
Recognizing negative thought patterns and 'rebooting' your world view is the key to confidence. NOT always changing the shallow things (such as specific hobbies or the way you look).
Interests can be a good icebreaker to conversation but the real meat of conversation is what that interest means to them or how it applies to their lives.
Like a movie for example, how does the person see the characters? Why do they like and relate to the characters that they like? Why are they touched by the storyline and events???
It's cliche but one of my fav books and movies is Fight Club. I relate to the main character. I feel helpless in life. I feel at the mercy of the mainstream. I struggle with my desires to fit in and another half of me that is destructive. Because I am atheist I have a very nihilistic way of viewing time, existence, and the human experience. Many scenes from the movie explore that. I wont go too deep into it but really hobbies just serve as a buffer for real conversations in which you could make a connection.
29 min later 8104990 Anonymous
okcupid is the ultimate expression of the heterosexual sexual marketplace.
men have to peacock and attract women by being attractive, witty, and rich. all the cute girls you message with something thoughtful and clever? they always delete your shit. they are only interesting in the chad thundercocks in their geographic area.
31 min later 8105006 Anonymous
>>8104946
There is a difference between true confidence and being fake. He gains confidence the cheep way through manipulation. A person like this is truly failing. A person who is honest has a better chance at happiness.
33 min later 8105033 ThatOneGuy
>>8104474
I would destroy the girl in that picture provided we got along well enough to permit sexual conduct.
>told gf I have a thing for girls with abnormal hair colors / highlights
>she gets highlights and dresses better to catch my eye
34 min later 8105057 Anonymous
>two or three weeks ago
>message cute girl with high match%, similar interests
>she likes the message and immediately suggests us going out sometime
>suggest a date, she's busy, i'm busy, tell her we'll talk later
>finally get around to messaging her last week because i was busy and kinda forgot about okc
>shows clear interest in me, we flirt heavily, she calls me handsome, etc
>tired so tell her i'm about to sleep and that she should give me her number
>no reply the next day
>no reply the day after, send another lighthearted message relating back to the first date she suggested
>still no reply three days later
i'm lost, obviously used to rejection on there but not like this; she's logged on pretty frequently since i asked so it's not like she hasn't gotten to it
36 min later 8105082 Anonymous
>>8104972
>hobbies just serve as a buffer for real conversations in which you could make a connection.
I have a good friend who LOVES heavy metal and only listens to that. I can't stand her tastes in this. Though I find it intriguing it is her interest. It speaks for her character WHY she likes music like this. She expresses her anger though the music. Her anger from a lot of past experiences and generally being put upon. Because she has that outlet the rest of her life she is kind and one of the most gentle people I've ever met. The heavy metal is a fascinating juxtaposition to how she interacts with people. For her its empowering to take part in.
So you really want to find out more about the person as a person and hobbies can give insight as to what resonates with their emotions.
Don't have a high schoolers mentality and think people are defined by their interests. Interests and hobbies are only on the surface.
36 min later 8105088 Anonymous
>>8104474
That's nothing to brag about at all. Any female who's at least semi attractive will get that many messages you troll
39 min later 8105130 mysterys biggest fan
>>8105057
She probably had no intention of actually going on a date with you.
A lot of people create profiles just for self-assurance. It's a nice little ego boost to know there are men out there who desire you.
41 min later 8105152 Anonymous
>>8104972
>No, it's not. You should always be honest.
Haven't seen it? You can watch it later. Haven't read it? You can read it while you set up a date.
Online dating doesn't pay off until you actually meet the person, or move away from the site itself and establish some minimum utility, or security, of communication.
Are you unfailingly honest with everyone you first meet? Do you let them know how sad you are before you've told them your name? Every facet of expression, unconscious or otherwise, speaks chapters about the kind of person you are. When you're in public, your body language is enhanced according to however insecure or self-conscious you are around others. If you want to appear upbeat and attractive, you change that. You alter your speech and think of things you'd never ponder alone, just to keep your head above water.
>>8105006
>A person who is honest has a better chance at happiness.
Happiness isn't free. Happiness does not always lie at the end of a path of least resistance.
44 min later 8105191 Anonymous
>>8105152
If you base your happiness off other's opinions you will never be happy or be able to think for yourself.
49 min later 8105248 Anonymous
>>8105152
The thing you don't understand is there is nothing shameful about being sad. There is nothing shameful or innately 'bad' about the dark spectrum of emotions. If you truly understood charisma you would know you could see anything. Sadness is a flavor of seduction as well. Someone can come off as mysterious by being aloof, cynical, and cold. To other personality types this could be irresistible. They would find the challenge of getting to know you, being the special one to crack your shell exciting. And that's just ONE example of how 'sadness' can be a charming technique.
49 min later 8105258 Anonymous
>>8105248
>> you could see anything.
I mean to type you could SELL anything.
50 min later 8105269 Anonymous
> okaycupid
fucking women
1 hours later 8105411 Anonymous
>>8105191
That's just how he stated it. If you want to be happy in a social circle or with a mate, you're going to have to care what they think of you.
>>8105248
No; my point was that you wouldn't reveal something you were actually ashamed of. You wouldn't bare yourself whole whenever you're in public. Otherwise, you're absolutely correct about charisma and being able to sell anything. If someone wants to be liked, they're going to only show the best parts of themselves. Everything else goes on standby. As if it never existed.
1 hours later 8105517 Anonymous
>>8105248
I'm waiting for your reply, but basically I'm saying I don't think you think for yourself. I think you are actually a victim of social constructs MORE SO than the so called betas you think you are doing better than.
Because you have actually succumbed to a imagined standard of what you think is desirable in a human being.
Other than pure survival, meaning finding food and water and staying healthy there is nothing tethering you to the thought pattern you have.
You have a warped view of strength of character. You are the product of a tough and unfortunate environment and I think you did what you thought you had to do to have something to offer to the community. Are you really happy with yourself? Or are you at the mercy of other's opinions?
I urge everyone on this board to question the FOUNDATIONS of what they view to be 'negative' and 'positive' traits. Because in reality there is nothing wrong with being a virgin for example. Who makes the rules saying that something is bad? Life is not a game where you can level up in certain areas and gain trophies. Human psychology is much more complicated, thankfully.
Once you forgive yourself for your preconceived short comings and accept who you are you are free and empowered to explore just how capable you really are. It's up to you. Don't let your number of rejections (or on the flip side the number of successfully seduced) determine who you are.
1 hours later 8105561 Anonymous
>>8105411
>That's just how he stated it. If you want to be happy in a social circle or with a mate, you're going to have to care what they think of you.
I getcha. Confidence however, is partly the act of not caring what others think.
1 hours later 8105567 Anonymous
>>8105517
Oh and with all of these statements about what I think of you I'm making large leaps of assumption, do don't take it too seriously.
1 hours later 8105641 Anonymous
>>8105561
>Confidence however, is partly the act of not caring what others think.
Part of achieving that could be rebooting cognitive processes.
1 hours later 8105692 Anonymous
>>8105517
Now you're just conjecturing things about me.
>I think you are actually a victim of social constructs MORE SO than the so called betas you think you are doing better than.
No. I learned how they worked and used them to my advantage.
>Because you have actually succumbed to a imagined standard of what you think is desirable in a human being.
Actually, it was about taking the average most desirable traits and allowing those to be the only ones seen.
>You have a warped view of strength of character. You are the product of a tough and unfortunate environment and I think you did what you thought you had to do to have something to offer to the community. Are you really happy with yourself? Or are you at the mercy of other's opinions?
What's with you trying to prove that I don't think for myself?
>>8105567
Ah. Not a problem.
>>8105561
Even so; to be sure of yourself you'll also be sure of how others see you.
1 hours later 8105781 Anonymous
>>8105692
You can't control what others see because you have no idea first meeting someone who they are either. You don't know what their perception of life experiences have been so far. Unless you are a mind reader you don't know what they need in a partner. It's best to be yourself. Best way to find a fit.
1 hours later 8105824 Anonymous
>>8105641
"rebooting cognitive process"
yes, those are all words, but they don't really mean anything when put together
1 hours later 8105844 Anonymous (Untitled.png 454x393 19kB)
I-it's not like I care or anything! No way!
1 hours later 8105864 Anonymous
>>8105824
I think he was talking about drugs.
1 hours later 8105934 Anonymous
>>8104910
Send a message to Roxy, she's a qt.
1 hours later 8105991 Anonymous
>>8104910
> You might like
> a dude
did you say you were bi or something?
1 hours later 8106016 Anonymous
I really don't see the point in OKC. Even for someone like me with heaps of social awkwardness and anxiety issues, dating in the real world is 1000x easier.
Dating sites serve as a constant reminder to women that they have sooooo many options and that there's no reason for them to settle for anything less than perfect. In the real world they are limited to what's in their immediate vicinity. On the internet they can reach out to (or be contacted by) people on the other side of the planet to fulfill their insanely high expectations.
1 hours later 8106065 Anonymous
>>8105824
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognit ive_therapy
1 hours later 8106080 Anonymous
>>8105864
I'm not against that idea either.
4 hours later 8107842 Anonymous
>be a year+ ago
>I always write absolute fucktons in messages because I wouldn't expect to have to respond to a "Hey :)" were it me receiving it
>my profile reaches the character limit too
>click with one girl on opposite side of the globe
>no point seeming seductive from 11k miles so just talk to her about random shit
>this goes on for 20k words over the course of 8 months
>at one point calls me the coolest friend she's ever met and sends her love
>start talking about halloween
>there's no proper halloween really in whatever country
>reply to this
>receive no reply
>the only time I ever sent two messages in a row was when a birthday hit and I felt obliged to, assume conversations are in a "I go, you go" format
>3 months pass
>she's still online every couple of days
>delete account
y u no reply ;;
4 hours later 8107943 Anonymous
> Go on OKCupid
> Make a quick throwaway account
> Fill out 1000 questions
> We found you top match!
> It's your ex
welp... fuck you Okcupid.
4 hours later 8107964 TheEnforcer
>>8104474
>female
Stop oppressing your gender!
4 hours later 8107976 TheEnforcer
>>8107943
> Make a quick throwaway account
> Fill out 1000 questions
This a joke faggot?
4 hours later 8108081 Anonymous
>>8107976
What can I say? I like filling out surveys. Jesus.
4 hours later 8108150 Anonymous
Somehow I'm not surprised no one posted their okc.
4 hours later 8108379 Anonymous
>>8105844
oh god this is so sad. i feel like i would see this everyday if o had an okc account. im sorry. i doubt theres anyone decentvon there anyway anon.
5 hours later 8108575 Anonymous
>>8108150
One person did. Im too lazy to go up and link the post or find it tho.
5 hours later 8108875 Anonymous
>>8108150
mostly im afraid of being ridiculed for my shitty taste in everything and am afraid to share information about myself on an otherwise anonymous website
5 hours later 8108947 Anonymous
>>8108150
how many times do we need this fucking thread reposted
dating sites have one simple rule: either be female, or really fucking attractive, otherwise you are wasting your time
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