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2013-06-04 10:40 7208156 Anonymous (IMG_20130604_043432.jpg 360x564 33kB)
>finally lose virginity after a year of working out, learning fashion, forcing myself to socialize >everything goes much better than expected >best night of my life >wake up in the morning to pic related on my phone >can't contain all these feels Is this what it feels like to be normal?

1 min later 7208170 Ricky
>>>/adv/ You need some advice on trolling son

2 min later 7208178 Anonymous
Fuck you cunt I want to lose my virginity. PS. How big is your dick then? No lying, you're anonymous.

3 min later 7208191 Anonymous
If you are for real, I'm happy for you. Losing my virginity for me was also an amazing and pleasant experience. Feels good, doesn't it? Enjoy it, c'mon, be a bit careless, just live for now. If you're trolling, meh, whatever. This is what normal feels like.

3 min later 7208200 no7
>>7208156 >you didn't spend the night with her What are you? Gay?

3 min later 7208201 Anonymous
>>7208170 I don't get it. I lost my virginity so must be trolling?

4 min later 7208204 Anonymous
how old are u op?

4 min later 7208217 Anonymous (1366658480856.jpg 310x310 20kB)
>believing her

5 min later 7208221 Anonymous
Ah, yes. I remember that feeling of being normal. It was a pretty cool couple of years.

5 min later 7208228 Anonymous
>>7208178 It's not even that big, about 7". I think it's just because she's asian. Still feelsgoodman though.

6 min later 7208232 Anonymous
>>7208156 Nice op. I had sex like an hour ago abd she keeps telling me i'm big. Feels confident, man!

7 min later 7208248 Anonymous
>>7208200 Her bed is tiny and I'm 6'4", can't sleep in it. Also, early class morning.

8 min later 7208252 Anonymous
>>7208248 are u fucking a 13 year old or some shit what the fu ck

10 min later 7208276 no7
>>7208248 >Her bed is tiny and I'm 6'4", can't sleep in it. And of course your place was no good. . . because?

10 min later 7208279 Anonymous
>>7208252 under age, go back to /b/

10 min later 7208282 Anonymous
>>7208252 >manlet detected 6'4" won't fit on anything smaller than a queen size, especially with 2 people.

12 min later 7208315 Anonymous
>>7208156 Cool story bro I don't care if it's not original, stupid bot.

15 min later 7208338 Anonymous
>>7208156 if trolling, didn't make me mad. if not, congratulations, you can now leave this godforsaken shithole and live your life like you've always wanted or can you? remember. you're here forever

16 min later 7208346 Anonymous
>>7208201 >Makes a troll thread: 1 point >Gets told : 2 points >Tries to damage control by playing dumb: 3 points Your current score is 6 points, my friend!

22 min later 7208413 Anonymous
>>7208282 >6'4" won't fit on anything smaller than a queen size >I'm 6'4" and forced to sleep on dorm twin-sized bed So this is pretty much bullshit, right?

22 min later 7208414 Anonymous
>gf and I decide to lose virginity to each other >she pulls down my pants and sees my cock for the first time >just sort of inspects it >hear her mumble "it's really big" >grin and ask her to repeat that >she goes bright red and denies she said anything >mfw I'm not even 7 inches

27 min later 7208456 Anonymous
>>7208346 >run around calling every legitimate thread a troll >the ultimate troll

28 min later 7208468 Anonymous
>>7208413 And your legs don't dangle over the edge, making it impossible to sleep unless you spread eagle, which isn't possible if someone is sleeping with you?

30 min later 7208484 Anonymous
>>7208414 She had nothing to compare it to. Don't worry, they guy she cheats on you with will actually be big.

32 min later 7208508 Anonymous
How did it happen then?

32 min later 7208515 Anonymous
>>7208484 Well that's the joy of being 15

33 min later 7208517 Anonymous
>>7208484 Should've specified. She was my gf at the time, now ex. And she didn't cheat on me, although I'm ashamed to admit I cheated on her at one point. Thankfully she never found out.

33 min later 7208518 Anonymous
>>7208248 >I'm 6'4" Oh, now this thread actually makes sense

35 min later 7208534 Anonymous
>>7208468 Actually they do; this is usually why I just put the mattress on the floor and sleep it on that way, but then I have to deal with having an empty mattress frame in my room just taking up space.

35 min later 7208539 Anonymous
>>7208517 >implying she didn't cheat without you finding out >but you cheated on her without her finding out You're not really this naive, are you?

38 min later 7208570 Anonymous (Godson.jpg 220x332 14kB)
>Tfw being black >9 inch cock >Well-behaved and not criminal >Grills flirt with me a lot >Mfw swimming in teenage pussy

40 min later 7208585 Anonymous
>>7208570 In other news the sun rises in the morning

44 min later 7208621 Anonymous
>>7208539 No, I just know her well. I have a tendency to think the worst of people and that's screwed me over more than a few times, but I find it extremely difficult to picture her cheating.

45 min later 7208629 Cheshire Cat
>>7208539 For once I agree with a cheating post on /r9k/ Wow.

46 min later 7208643 Anonymous
>>7208585 Its funny since im still awkward as fuck and lost my virginity to a hooker, well thats how i practiced the first five times or so.

48 min later 7208659 Anonymous
>>7208570 where the hell do you live i want in on this

48 min later 7208665 Anonymous
>>7208643 Awkward? What does this even mean? I am probably universally attractive but I can at least hold a conversation ... come to think of it it would be awkward if you know that all women want your dick

50 min later 7208681 Anonymous
>>7208570 >tf when I know this feel exactly >except 8 inch not 9

52 min later 7208703 Anonymous (Wn3w29P[1].png 456x338 66kB)
>>7208217 >thinking the truth matters

55 min later 7208748 Anonymous (image.jpg 248x249 25kB)
>>7208156 I need to start doing this.

58 min later 7208786 Anonymous (image.jpg 500x503 72kB)
>>7208156 You have graduated from a robot to a normalfag, you can escort yourself out. We run off feels and you're not generating enough.

58 min later 7208788 Anonymous
>>7208156 Normalfag here, browsing r9k because fucking betas man, yes this i how we feel most of the time

59 min later 7208799 Anonymous (1369250969346.png 476x620 197kB)
I lost my virginity to a hooker on a friday night. Sifting through the crowds of tall happy people who were blessed by genetics and rubbed it in my face that I was subhuman trash that'll only get love at the cost of my wallet. The sex was ok though.

1 hours later 7208843 Anonymous
>>7208659 Tampa, FL

1 hours later 7208873 Anonymous
>>7208799 Yeah, thats a pretty accurate description of how it happened, nice dubs

1 hours later 7208890 Anonymous
>run into qt3.14 that I was acquantinces with 2 years ago back in hs >decided to muster up the courage to message her on fb >she gives me her number since she was too busy to facebook message me >she is a boring texter and just replies with short and to the point messages >not sure if she is just a boring texter, or if she isn't interested in talking to me

1 hours later 7208909 Anonymous (hoho.png 76x115 21kB)
>>7208570 >tfw being black >6 inch cock >well-behaved and not criminal >grills flirt with me a lot >mfw I don't know how to pick it up from there >mfw I'm oblivious to all the flirting and notice no less than 3/4 weeks later that they were actually trying to get me, fuck

1 hours later 7209002 Anonymous
>tfw ive told every.single.guy i've had penis-related relations with that his dick is big or the biggest I've seen!!!1 Much bigger than my ex boyfriend!! >tfw I watch "the sweetest thing" >tfw "your dick is so big" scene >fucking lol because it's relatable to all women who encounter dicks On the flip side, happy for you OP. Just lol'd because her messages look EXACTLY like mine do the next day, even down to the playful "don't let it get to your head :P" to seem more sincere. ha. women.

1 hours later 7209539 Anonymous
>>7208156 >your dick is huge lol How big does a dick need to be for this to happen? No girl has ever told me that.

3 hours later 7210765 Anonymous
Time for some feel-good stories > Be 16 > Have neighbors from across that street that I've known for practically my whole life > They have a son who's 16 and a daughter who's 15 (let's call them David and Danielle for privacy's sake) > Both are great to hang with, play vidya with, etc. > Never really attracted to daughter, although she is 7-8/10 and very well-spoken > One night, me and David are playing N64 vidya together and Danielle decides to snuggle against my arm > I embrace her and pull her in; she likes it; David is okay with it since we're all practically siblings at this point > At this point, I can feel teenage hormones running wild and all of sudden I'm attracted to her (surprise surprise) > David and Danielle go to bed; I sleep on the couch like normal wondering about the earlier events of the evening > I wake up around 3 AM and notice that Danielle is sleeping right next to me (wtf how did she get out here?) > I shrug my shoulders and go back to sleep > I wake up again at 5 AM to the feeling of her snuggling against my arm and the sound of her breathing on my face > Feelsgoodbro.jpg > I fall back asleep and wake up again at 8 AM and this time we both wake up simultaneously > We cuddle and lightly make out before getting up to get breakfast > Fast forward a year and a half > During the past 18 months, we've gone on several dates, acted wild in public together, made out on countless occasions and gotten really close (we made a mutual agreement not to have sex due to David not being comfortable with it and since David was a real bro I didn't want to offend him) > Find out that David and Danielle are moving to Boston because their dad got a work promotion > The first and only girl who I've really been intimate with is leaving for good > Neither her or David have FB > Cell numbers end up going bad 3 months after they leave > tfw all alone and nogf because I'm too awkward to interact with any other girls Feel with me robots

3 hours later 7210796 IanBrady
Oh look! Another fucking troll thread started by an AMERICAN Banning Americans = Banning trolls/normal-fags

3 hours later 7210843 Anonymous
>>7208156 how's it feel to know that you earned what everyone else got for free? that you had to prove yourself to humanity while others got the free ride, I've seen people who never took care of themselves have girlfriends I never had dreamed to date. while the ones I go after think so lowly of me. so tell me, how does it feel? that you lost and had to crawl your way back up while everyone else got the escalator?

3 hours later 7210851 Anonymous
>>7210796 I'm not even American, but I don't think they can hear you over the sound of their freedom. Relax, brah

3 hours later 7210895 Anonymous
>>7210765 This isn't feel-good. Now I want success stories. Fuck this noise.

4 hours later 7210913 IanBrady
>>7210851 Don't deny it, most troll threads are started when Americans are awake

4 hours later 7210957 Anonymous (youreafag.gif 413x192 1466kB)
>>7210913 Most people are waking up in other countries at this point too you dumbshit.

4 hours later 7210966 Anonymous
>>7210796 Wait, you're not American? Nevermind. I don't want your babies anymore.

4 hours later 7210996 Anonymous
>>7208414 this is so anime

4 hours later 7210997 Anonymous
>6'4 >7 inch penis Son, go away. Go away from here and never return.

4 hours later 7211010 IanBrady
>>7210966 Americans are inferior, Britain invented the most

4 hours later 7211025 Anonymous
>>7209002 So how big are these dicks? And what do you consider big?

4 hours later 7211032 IanBrady
>>7210999 *gif Fuck this fucking phone... Also I hope you checked m8

4 hours later 7211048 Anonymous
In a few weeks she will find somebody more interesting than you. She will start to flake when you are supposed to hang out then ignore you all together.

4 hours later 7211063 Anonymous
>>7211010 >Americans are inferior >Britain, the country that got pushed back by a couple of rough necks with rusty cannons and muskets A part of me is glad Obama's not pulling your ass out of the water and making you drown with the rest of Europe. You fuckers have been mouthing off for 200 fucking years like you're some thin, beautiful utopia when most of you fuckers are ugly, fat and just as degenerate as southern Americans.

4 hours later 7211100 Anonymous
>>7209002 >"your dick is so big" scene No girl has ever told me my penis is big. They always tell me how hard it is when having sex. >tfw it's a cop out compliment because I have a small penis

4 hours later 7211103 Anonymous
>>7208156 >not replying with "OK, but I'll let it go to your head."

4 hours later 7211163 Anonymous
>>7208156 >hey you >2 minutes later >sleep ok? fucking hell OP, you couldn't just let it go, you HAD to follow up. Fuck.

4 hours later 7211165 IanBrady
>>7211063 > claims to not be American > is defending it It was a civil war, Brits vs Brits, Washington is a traitor, and some bullshit about tea tax Be thankful America doesn't speak Spanish, French, German or Dutch... There's a reason why they don't

4 hours later 7211210 Anonymous
>>7211165 Because we already perfected the English language, why waste time perfecting another?

4 hours later 7211282 IanBrady
>>7211210 No, Dutch were there before the English, we took over New Amsterdam and Britain built New Yor-ork! New York!

4 hours later 7211372 Anonymous (zmbgd.jpg 500x375 20kB)
>Lost virginity at 30 to a woman 3 years younger than me >7" long, 5.25" around >She was so loose even though she was petite >Couldn't come from fucking because there wasn't enough stimulation >She tries to get me off with her hand >She sucks at this >Take my own hand and jack off until I jizz on her stomach >She never talks to me again outside of hello and such >Not even at work >Every other girl I can pull is just as loose or looser >None of them are as good with their hands as I am >After I get tired of fucking them I use my hands and tongue for about an hour >Keep getting called back now by one girl, but I can see in her eyes while I'm fucking her that she's just waiting to get eaten out Meanwhile, all of my high school friends have had kids.

4 hours later 7211390 Anonymous
>>7211372 And people say that vaginas don't get loose lel. 5.25" should be plenty of girth.

4 hours later 7211415 Anonymous (tumblr_mcvgdkDAD71rug4a3o1_400 (2).gif 400x300 755kB)
>>7211390 I live in southern Louisiana. Promiscuity isn't a big deal here, so by the time a girl's 27 it's not unusual for her to have had 50 dicks inside her.

4 hours later 7211438 Anonymous
>>7211415 you're either short as fuck or that dick is way bigger than 7"

4 hours later 7211479 Anonymous
>>7211438 tallfag here with a 7" cock, he's short as fuck. My dick was the first thing to grow, so I was a 4'10" 11 year old with a 7" cock who thought he had the biggest dick in the world and a bright future - my cock was literally almost half as long as my thigh. Now that I'm 6'1" my 7" cock looks tiny, and girls pretty much always expect a 9" monolith or some shit when unzip my pants.

4 hours later 7211495 Anonymous (tumblr_lnra7esZlA1qcugj9o1_500.jpg 500x374 40kB)
>>7211438 It's not me, I just think dicks look good so I save pictures of them. No homo.

4 hours later 7211510 Anonymous (tumblr_m2mkufTaCg1rs8hffo1_500.jpg 500x573 101kB)
>>7211479 BTW, 5'10". Not short, not tall.

4 hours later 7211516 Anonymous
>>7211479 Better to be 6ft1 with a 7" cock, than 5ft10" with a cock that barely reaches 6". At least I have decent girth so not killing myslf yet

5 hours later 7211664 Anonymous
>>7208843 We need to talk anon. I live in Melbourne. I demand your Skype so we can hang out

5 hours later 7211713 Anonymous
>Only 15% of the male population has a penis bigger than 6.5 inches >Tfw the whole 15% are aspies on /r9k/ I completely and utterly believe it. I also believe that Odin isn't a fat aspie acting out his fantasies on the internet.

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